January 12, 2009
Recalibrate your goals
It's actually quite fun to write about goals. Especially since I reached nearly all our goals in 2008. Even financially, we reached our goal nearly on the dot. We added just the number of clients that we wanted to work with. We could have added more, but then, it was 'gametime" and we tried something new in our strategy.
I am serious. That's how powerful goal setting is.
We learned a lot and just when we thought we got it, the recession hits. How positive and powerful. Because it is so much easier to work, manage and lead in good times. Now, in the so-called bad times, we need to be more flexible and we are - are you?
This also means that we are able to recalibrate our goals. You see, there is nothing more desperate than writing down a goal, and subbornly following its pathway when the world breaks down and the universe throws bricks at you. This means that you don't look at "reality". Things can go wrong, for sure. Clients postpone projects, a training doesn't work out, things get cancelled. Does this mean we have to stick to numbers and insist that this is the way forward and nothing else? Does this mean we ignore the financial crisis? Hope that the universe will be gentle with us?
No way!
Sometimes it is good to re-look at things. Change the strategy. Look for diversification. Entice different customers (that are aligned with your values).
Keep the outcome in mind, so. Ultimately you want to reach your goals, right? The big ones. The real stretching ones. The cool ones. Those that wow you. That keep you excited when you go to bed and that motivate you when you get up even before the alarmclock rings.
It is just a gentle reminder to look at your goals. Where are you standing now? Hey it's only January, I hear you say and I just finished your earlier exercise.
Not a problem, lol.
It just means that you need to know what you are doing. Include what happens. Check your goals. Daily, or weekly. Are the still actual, reachable and realistic. Did something happen that you didn't expect? Are you on course?
Ask yourself, how does an external event influence your ultimate goal.
Tick it off:
It does not influence me means you can keep going.
It does influence me - check out the impact. Can you still reach your goal? Do you need to be flexible? Adjust or recalibrate your goals?
Then do it.
You remember that in NLP we have the NLP Presuppositions, which are convenient assumptions or beliefs that guide the way, a NLP Practitioner looks at the world.
One of these presuppositions states that the "Element or Person with the highest flexibility dominates the system." That demands from you to be actively checking your current situation.
Okay, it is only 2 weeks into January. Are you on track with your goal?
_______________________________________________________________________________
Public Programmes: Asia Mind Dynamics organises new courses for those interested to become NLP Practitioners, NLP Coaches, Hypnotists or those that want to simply improve their influence and communication skills
For more information, follow these links:
To learn Certified NLP Practitioner and Certified Timeline Therapy™ Techniques Training, click here.
To learn more about our Advanced Coaching Programme, click here
To learn more about the Language and Behaviour Profile (LAB Profile) - Words That Change Minds Certification, click here
To register for any of these courses, click here.
To learn more about Asia Mind Dynamics, click here
For companies, interested to know more about in-houses courses, click here.
Alternatively, send an email to andreas.dorn AT gmail.com or najwadorn AT yahoo.com or call 012-287 5048 (Andreas) or Najwa (012-3276 048) for a discussion about your needs and requirements.
See you soon!
Posted by Andreas at 07:39 PM | Comments (0)
January 06, 2009
Why New Year's Resolutions don't work and how you can buck the trend - Part 3
This is Part 3 of the Goal Setting Series of Asia Mind Dynamics. We show you proven methodologies to make 2009 a real WoW year - the Best Year Ever, for you!
In the first part of this series, we debunked the myth around New Year's Eve Resolutions, but also asked you to do some work to get ready for the real stuff.
Yesterday we worked around the "linguistic part" of goals and how to formulate a goal that really works.
Today, let me introduce you to a set of questions called "Keys To An Achievable Outcome". These questions come from Neuro Linguistic Programming. They are also one of the first tools used when coaching a new client.
These questions may sound easy to answer. However, they are directed to establish certain criteria to ascertain success in the goal setting procedure.
1. Stated in the positive.
“What specifically do you want?”
That's the part, we dealt with yesterday. The part that outlines your goals. And, remember, that here, you can classify your goals according to the different areas of your life, as outlined in the first part of this series. In the meantime, you probably understand that a goal must be formulated as a positive statement. Thus, not something that you don't want.
If you have something that contains a "negative" or a "I don't want..." turn it around and ask yourself: 'What do you want instead?". Imagine, you enter a taxi and you tell them that you want don't want to go to KLCC, not to Megamall, not to Sunway Pyramid. All you end up with aer locations that you don't want to go to. It won't tell the taxi driver where you want to go, where your final destination is. He probably throws you out of the taxi, mah!
Remember, it is about creating the focus on the positive. And you probably know the saying that what you focus on expands. So if you start focussing on a negative goal or something that you don't want anymore, well, it expands.
2. Specify present situation.
"Where are you now?"
This question relates to establishig a baseline. It is your starting point. It clarifies your current situation, or your present situation. I understand that this can be painful, but you need to be honest here. Hey - it is just for you, and no one else. But it will also indicate to you somewhere down the road, how far have you come.
It is like your starting point when you enter the taxi. You know where you are. You are at KLCC, for example. And once you are on the road, and even if you get stuck in a traffic jam, hey you can always verify the distance that you travelled already. Isn't that cool?
3. Specify outcome.
“What will you see, hear, feel, etc., when you have it?”
We are back to the development of the outcome. This is a critical step. Let's be serious here, okay (haven't we before already?).
Have you seen movies in your life? Can you imagine a movie scene right now? This is how I want you to visualise your goal. It is about dreaming about its achievement. You ARE the actor and you are acting as if you see the world! Make sure it is through your own eyes. And make sure, you are the main actor, okay?
About seeing what will happen once you got your goal. TWho will be around you. What will you hear? What will people say to you and what are you saying in your head to yourself. It is about living the outcome of the dream. When you wanted to get this dream figure, how does this make your feel? If you get the wealth you wanted, what will you do? How will all that be for you?
Really live the features. Get the feelings for it. Once you have those great feelings, even amplify them. make everything bigger, more dramatc, so you really feel good about the achievement of the goal.
Feelings are important to give you the drive. The juice to go forward. To make the goal/s really compelling! With feelings there is the internal drive to make things happen.
Now, and this is important. I want you to stick the date of achievement to the goal or that movie. When is it you said you achieved that goal. Remember, I asked you to do this in the first step? Now you imprint that date into your unconscious mind.
Now, even more important - as a last step for this step I want you to STEP OUTof your body, so you see your body in the picture now. Make it, what we call 'dissociated' (NLP has a strange style of describing processes). But just imagine seeing yourself. It is like seeing yourself as actor in the movie. You are now THE STAR of the scene. And while you step out of your body, keep the emotions that you felt earlier, when you looked through your own eyes. Emotions are what is important here as well.
It is a crucial step so take this seriously serious!
4. Specify evidence procedure.
“How will you know when you have it?”
Be specific here. Very specific. If you wanted to lose weight, write down your target weight. Know where to verify that goal, once you have achieved it - e.g.; you know it when weighing yourself on the scale. People compliment you. Your size is smaller. You feel better and where will that be. Be as specific as possible. Remember our metaphor with the taxi, mentioned in the second series? It is like reaching your destination with a taxi and you know you reached your goal. What will you see, here and feel, once you reached your destination. Got it?
5. Is it congruently desirable?
“What will this outcome get for you or allow you to do?”
Oftentimes, when I talk to people about their goals, they are able to state what they want. May be they even know the first steps that we did so far. But then, what is often forgotten is the impact of the goal achievement. What is happening once you achieved the goal. How will it change your life. What would be the next action to take? Sometimes, people play lotto to get rich. Then, once this happens, they are overwhelmed because they never planned out what will happen or what they will do with the money. Sure, they might have some vague imagination, but isn't it safer and more secure to really know what is the next plan of action?
Also, in this phase of the goal setting procedure, take into account the impact on your environment. If you are married what is the impact of you reaching the goal. Imagine, you lost all this weight, and your husband or wife actually wanted you to be a bit more chubby - what is the possible impact of this? Imagine, you wanted to open your own company - what will be the impact on that result on your family, your loved ones, heck, even on the country.
6. Is it self-initiated and self-maintained?
“Is it only for you?”
Now, many of us are not aware, but a goal set for you by your boss is not self-initiated. Same, if your doctor told you to lose this extra-fat and you agreed to it. This is not self-finitiated, but by someone else. Okay, you can get your own buy-in, if the goal still inspires you. But overall, it sure is better if you were the initiator.
You also want to be aware if you are able to follow-through on the goal. This is the meaning of self-maintenance. Are there any outside forces that could cause the whole 'project' to go haywire? You would need to calculate their impact, and probably ensure that responsibility for ensuring success on the goal achievement stays at 100% with you.
If you are less than 100% responsible, please re-look the goal.
7. Is it appropriately contextualized?
“Where, when, how, and with whom do you want it?”
It is now here, where you can add on all the people, places and actions that are around the goal achievement. Because, I believe that you don't want to achieve your goal alone. There is someone around you, be it family, or friends. This is the easy part.
But now, also let's go back to the initial write-up. Remember, I asked you to classify your goals under different headers? It is here, where the answer to this question comes to fruit. Are you planning to achieve your goal in the spiritual area, in the personal development area, is it health related etc. It is highly likely that these areas include different people different locations, and different ways to achieve it.
Ah - you probably saw it - the HOW part is in here. It is the year of execution. So HOW do you want to achieve you goal. What actions to take? Remember, one of the lists of day one also contained behaviours? This list comes handy here, doesn't it? So be clear about the how-to achieve your goal. I am also a strong believer in the first actionstep. Taking the first step is like giving your unconscious mind the signal to get started. Please make sure that it is an easy step. As easy as possible. Do you know why? Well, make it easy because you want to have the feeling of success the moment you get started to work on your goal. Imagine it would not be easy? The likelihood to give up or even to "fail" is much higher. So really, make it an easy step and celebrate success the moment you achieved and reached that particular outcome. Because you are on your way!
8. What resources are needed?
“What do you have now, and what do you need to get your outcome?”
• “Have you ever had or done this before?”
• “Do you know anyone who has?”
Let's do a SWOT (Strength, Weakness, Opportunities and Threat) analysis on your current situation. Now you are already pretty clear where you are, but we have not yet talked about the different strength points you have. What do you already know regarding your goals. What are the resources available to you already.
Resources are internal and external "things" that help you to achieve your goals. May be it is a support group. May be your family. May be many books, great friends, or may be your knowledge and education. Write this down and also, how you can utilise those.
Next, what are the additional resources you need. Is it a training, a mentor, a coach, books or something else that can support you in reaching your goals. These are the external resources you might require to succeed.
And hey, what many goal setting books and videos tell you. Inform those friends and relatives about your goals. Ask them to support and monitor you. It has been shown through research that such system is really useful to get you going on and to maintain your goal achievement.
Then, of course, we have initial resources. These are things like confidence, passion, patience or perseverance.
To know that you have done something similar before is helpful as well. Even if you failed at that time, now would be the time to review the reasons for that failure. Ask yourself what could you do differently this time. If you haven't done something similar before, then may be you know someone who did. Go and ask how they did it, and learn their strategies, or ways to go about it. Learn.
9. Is it ecological?
• “For what purpose do you want this?”
• “What will you gain or lose if you have it?”
There is always something to win or lose when we go for something like a goal. Again, ask yourself, what will happen when you achieved your goal. What is the ultimate purpose for achieving this goal.
Have you followed me until here? Congratulations. Now go and get it done. Write down your answers to all the questions.
I would also love to hear from you on how it goes. Goals are too important to let them hang around. One last thing, that you could do. Print out those goals and pin them everywhere in your home. Have them in front of you. Let them inspire you. Read your document that you prepared should you feel down.
And don't forget - Celebrate the victories.
Go now and get them!!
_______________________________________________________________________________
Public Programmes: Asia Mind Dynamics organises new courses for those interested to become NLP Practitioners, NLP Coaches, Hypnotists or those that want to simply improve their influence and communication skills
For more information, follow these links:
To learn Certified NLP Practitioner and Certified Timeline Therapy™ Techniques Training, click here.
To learn more about our Advanced Coaching Programme, click here
To learn more about the Language and Behaviour Profile (LAB Profile) - Words That Change Minds Certification, click here
To register for any of these courses, click here.
To learn more about Asia Mind Dynamics, click here
For companies, interested to know more about in-houses courses, click here.
Alternatively, send an email to andreas.dorn AT gmail.com or najwadorn AT yahoo.com or call 012-287 5048 (Andreas) or Najwa (012-3276 048) for a discussion about your needs and requirements.
See you soon!
Posted by Andreas at 05:45 PM | Comments (0)
January 05, 2009
Why New Year's Resolutions don't work and how you can buck the trend - Part 2
A clearer definition of achievable goals
Yesterday I started a series related to the skill of goal setting that makes goals achievable and compelling. As it is it sounds like an easy task, doesn’t it? Just write it down.
Well, it isn’t that easy and while I was at it I suggested that you prepare a couple of things before we today start really working on the formulation of goals for 2009.
1. The first step was to prepare a list of achievements in your areas of life. Where were you successful? Did you do it? Was it fun? The reason why I asked you to do this was because we often forget that we achieve something in our life. We oftentimes focus on the big tasks the Big Audacious Goals to then forget to celebrate the little wins. Don’t forget that the little wins add up to big ones in the medium to long run!
2. The second list that I suggested you do was to create a list of things you really want to achieve in 2009. I asked you to simply write down what came to your mind, unedited and uncensored and fast, to allow the unconscious mind to just direct your hand.
3. The next step was related to this second one and I asked you to classify your points mentioned under 2.) under a couple of headers. These were relationships family, career and professional development, health and fitness, personal growth and development, and spirituality.
4. Next, I asked you to associate behaviours to those “goals” – e.g.; from ‘I want to loose weight’ to “ I eat lesser (or healthier) to loose weight’
5. The last step was to attribute a date to the completion of the goals.
Today, I outline the ‘art of goal” writings. The header, before the whole process of finalising the process commences tomorrow.
Now, let’s see how many people usually write goals. They write it like in a fashion like that:
I want to lose weight or I want to lose 15 kilos of weight.
Sadly, this is the wrong way to express a goal. You need to eliminate the word ‘want’ from your goal list. Why not ‘want’ do I hear you asking? Because want is just a wish. It is not goal. There is wanton desire attributed with it, but no drive for the unconscious mind to really work at the goal. The second sentence is better, as at least, it is specific with regard to the goal. This gives the unconscious mind some direction, but not enough. It is diluted as a goal, since it still contains the word “want” In addition, it still needs a target date as well.
So instead, write your goal without the word “want” okay? It would sound like this: “It is December 15 2009, and I now weigh …. (write down the target weight!!).
In December 2009 I will be rich or In December 15, I will earn RM15,000 per month or ‘In December 2009 I earn more money than today’
Sadly this also is NOT the right style to succeed. Or, may be you succeeded in this style earlier, and may be it was a bit of a struggle.
Again, what needs to happen is to state the goal as in the following: “It is December 2009, and I now earn RM15,000 per month.
Do you identify the formula?
You should write a goal as in the following:
“It is (add in the date), and I now (important) am/ be/ have ___________ (write down the goal).
I know it sounds tedious but it is like a little Chandra. In addition, it is specific, and it is stated in present tense, as if now.
Present tense is important, because it activates the neurology. It is called the “As If” Frame in NLP. Through the As If Frame, you are starting to act as if you have achieved your goal already.
It sounds like a simple linguistic trick but is more than that. It goes beyond wanting only or willing, but about really achieving your goals.
Tomorrow I will introduce you to powerful questioning techniques called “Keys To An Achievable Outcome.” These are a few questions that catapults your planning to the next level.
Till Then,
Andreas
____________________________________________________________________________
Public Programmes: Asia Mind Dynamics organises new courses for those interested to become NLP Practitioners, NLP Coaches, Hypnotists or those that want to simply improve their influence and communication skills
For more information, follow these links:
To learn Certified NLP Practitioner and Certified Timeline Therapy™ Techniques Training, click here.
To learn more about our Advanced Coaching Programme, click here
To learn more about the Language and Behaviour Profile (LAB Profile) - Words That Change Minds Certification, click here
To register for any of these courses, click here.
To learn more about Asia Mind Dynamics, click here
For companies, interested to know more about in-houses courses, click here.
Alternatively, send an email to andreas.dorn AT gmail.com or najwadorn AT yahoo.com or call 012-287 5048 (Andreas) or Najwa (012-3276 048) for a discussion about your needs and requirements.
See you soon!
Posted by Andreas at 07:12 PM | Comments (0)