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September 25, 2005
Santa Claus is not coming to town anymore
My boy believed in Santa Claus. It was always a great time before Christmas to prepare him for the event. Last year, he wrote a huge list of wishes and hoped to get presents. There were critical questions along the way, of course. How does Santa Claus know that we have shifted place. What is Santa Claus doing since our condominium doesn't have a chimney. How long does it take to bring presents to all the children. Last year I even told him that I saw Santa Claus once, in a hotel. Subsequently, he, and his cousin, really believed. His cousin, who also received presents, was terrified.
Over the last couple of months, some of my kid's friends in school told him that there is no Santa Claus and that his father and mother would buy those presents. So, from time to time, he asked me already, but I also told him that it is up to him to believe and why shouldn't there be a Santa Claus (see the Wiki for the background).
Last Friday I wasn't at home, and in the evening, my wife and my kid were sitting together in the living room. My boy was drawing and suddenly, he asked my wife if there is Santa Claus. She asked him, what it was that he believed and he mentioned his friend's saying again. So she said that there is no Santa Claus (secretly wishing that I would be there - men are always out when needed, isn't it?). He broke down in tears and asked, why we did lie to him for such a long time. So my wife, fantastic as she is in really understanding such situations (not only involving my kid but also advising me), explained to him that we pretended to be the Santa Claus because we loved him so much. That we wanted to buy him his presents he wished for so much, but couldn't do it, because we would spoil him rodden (as if we never buy him anything anyway!), and that we wanted to give him because we never had that much when we were young. In addition, we wanted to create a belief in him, giving him the ability to believe in something really special, specially made for children.
Over time, my boy calmed down and he is okay now. It is hard when a belief breaks down! When kids are young, it still is easier to change, but when one gets older, it becomes tougher and more beliefs become really entrenched in our belief system.
Just now, I sat with him for a short while and showed him background on the web regarding Santa Claus and he is so wonderfully understanding. I simply, plainly love my boy!
Posted by Andreas at September 25, 2005 10:54 AM
Comments
how sweet... your boy is surely your greatest wonder. lucky you!
i don't know how i knew, but as a child, i always knew that santa claus wasn't real. but in the corner of my heart, i had this tiny little hope that one christmas morning, a present would mysteriously appear by my bed, by some miracle!
Posted by: adriene at October 14, 2005 03:00 AM
yeah..i believe in Santa until i saw a colour Santa ( an indian uncle).
I slowly began to wonder.
Then i saw different version of santa at shopping mall.
Fat,thin, short,fair,glasses and without glasses.
Then i wonder more.
Posted by: viv at October 1, 2005 07:04 AM
Wow, you sure brought your kid up well for him to take it so well. I know I woulda thrown a fit of epic proportions back when I was a toddler. :P Kudos to your wife and you on a job well done!
Posted by: dinghy at September 27, 2005 07:21 PM
wah, your bini a real expert. i wouldn't be able to answer like that! *shame shame*
Posted by: belacans at September 27, 2005 06:46 PM
Well, your kid is a smart one, that much I can say. I'm sure he spent quite a while gathering facts and deducting things around before finally coming to a conclusion. It's great that he gives a chance for your wife to explain herself, too. This will prove to be a very useful trait to have once he starts to have friends that mistreat him [and they wish to explain themselves].
As for Santa, well... I never celebrated Christmas, so I never really believed that he'd pop by during Christmas and leave a present for me. But I did believe in his existence, somewhat. But after seeing a fat old Santa, and a hot ultra-sexy Mrs. Santa [well, several of them hot babes, if I may say so], I kinda figured, hey Santa is a polygamist! [when i was younger, i kinda thought of polygamists as mean people].
Once again, the web has proven useful to educating your kid, eh?
Posted by: Silencers at September 26, 2005 03:01 PM
Despite not being a Christian nor celebrating Christmas, I used to think Santa was real as a kid too - until I saw him one day get into a bus (in full Santa costume!) and then take off his beard...
It took me a long time to get over the shock... :D
Posted by: Sashi at September 25, 2005 11:36 AM